Word of the Day: Rancur

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rancur (n.): bitterness or ill will; hatred; malice

Nightlife is better with her. I have to admit. For one, I feel less of a creep when I people watch. It’s such a healthy hobby. It lets me know I’m actually the one who is still sane. A couple walks by with interlocked hands so tight, you would think the woman was delivering a baby or something. I’m talking about white-knuckle grip, tight. I mean why are they holding hands anyway? Hands are such troublesome things. I’ve decided that chronic hand holding is actually a disease. Mental of course. Neglect is like bacteria implanted by host’s parent(s) and developed over time until the host has full blown case of dependency syndrome.

The hands says a lot about a person. That’s why I take care of mine. I’m not taking care of them when they are being suffocated by some chick. In the case of hand holding, they become all sweaty, and clammy, and shit. I can’t be having that.

I look across the table.

Daniella knows not to try to hold my hand. She holds other things of mine. Things the public and other women can only dream of seeing. She looks up from her churro and smiles. Gorgeous thing she is. Her eyes are some shade of olive I’ve never seen before. The dress she is wearing says, “Fuck me now.” Damn cleavage is one of the most alluring I’ve seen in my life too. I pause.

Is it bad that I don’t feel guilty knowing she is just another one on my list? Just another body I’m going to smash. Again.

Another one of my victims.

I take a sip of my water. Not yet Neale. Not yet.

What I like about Daniella is that she is a bad girl. Or bad woman. Whatever the hell you wanna call them. Who knows what the hell women want to be called nowadays? Damn hypocrites.

The waiter stops at our table.

“Would you like anything else?” he asks.

“Check,” I say. Daniella purses her lips perfectly together like the drop dead, gorgeous siren she is, her eyelashes so long, they could probably touch her nose when she closes them. But the girl hardly ever blinks.

“Don’t you want dessert?” Daniella says to me. The waiter looks at me expectantly too, brows plunging into his hairline. This girl doesn’t know how to turn her freak off. I scratch my head.

“I left my sweet tooth back at the hotel baby,” I say light-heartedly.

“Room service then?”

Holy fuck. My blood starts moving a little bit faster.

The waiter clears his throat and walks away. Smart man.

Don’t hate the player. Hate the game.

I make a mental note to never be so cliché again.

“Only if it’s free,” I say.

“You’re so cheap,” she says.

“Don’t forget shallow,” I say raising a finger. She frowns.

“What are you trying to say?” Ah hell. She found me out.

“I’m not trying to say anything.” I search her eyes. I can already see she is looking too deep into what I just said. I’d be doing myself a disservice if I don’t put her in her place. So I tell her the truth. “I’m saying you were easy.”

There. I said it.

What am I saying? I’m really just that good. She wouldn’t have worn that ridiculous outfit if I hadn’t told her to wear it. I simply wanted to see what all I could make her do.

“Neale, you’re an ass. Did you know that?” I smile.

Is that what you told yourself last night when I was giving it to you?” There is real curiosity in my voice. As if I really didn’t know or something. Ha. Broads.

That’s when rancor filled her eyes.

“Neale, you’re really such a loser.” That’s right baby. Say whatever makes you feel better. “I don’t even know why I care.” You don’t. “Your sex was mediocre at best.”

“Now wait a minute!” That’s the last thing you say to my brand of man. The upper echelon.

“Take it back.” I’m pointing my finger at her and there is a bad taste in my mouth. As if her very words danced on my tongue. How dare she talks about my sex game in such layman terms.

Suddenly, the waiter is back and gives me the check.

“I hope you enjoyed your time with us,” he says and walks off.

I glance at the bill and look back at her.

“Don’t be such a hateful bitch all the time. Learn to appreciate good dick when you get it.” I look at the bill again. Any number seems like too much to be spending on her now. I should’ve never spent money on this bitch. I pay for the food and leave a decent tip.

“It’s time to get out of here before I do or say something I’m going to regret.” By the way I said it, she knows I mean business. I’m letting the temper get the best of me. Chillllll Neale.

A silent, mental woosah.

The ride back to the hotel was a little awkward. She gave me head the whole way back and told me I was the dumbest piece of shit she’d ever met. Another successful night in the world of dating I’d say.

Note to self: Never give a one night stand roll over minutes.

Word of the Day: Aesthetic

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aesthetic (adj.)- concerned with beauty or the appreciation of beauty.

I need to go out. It feels good to finally relax and what not. I mean truly, it does, but this room is too cramped. I rise from my chair and open the sliding door to go outside to enjoy the ocean.

Then I see her.

She is standing beneath the outside shower on our wooden balcony overlooking the ocean, her head tilted back and the water caressing her body from head to toe. My mouth drops. I think I might be jealous of the water on her tanned skin.

My heart picks up and blood and heat rushes to my groin in waves. Her aesthetic curves swing around her black thong and elegantly pushes her black top out in front of her so that I could see the fullness of her breast. Her hands reach back and run through her hair gloriously. Like a goddess.

Long fingers. Productive fingers she has. They run down her arms, over her chest, and down her legs as she bends over in front of me. I breathe again before I forget to.

I take a step onto the wood. It’s warm underneath my feet but I barely notice.

I’m in need her.

And I want her. That’s what matters.

I stride two more times and it’s enough for me to be on her back, pulling her back up towards me by her hair so that she is standing straight again and pushing my sex against the small of her back and down to her round butt. Fuck that feels good. I succumb to the feeling as she gasps and looks back at me. I look down at the tiny droplets on her neck and they run from me down to her cleavage as if to hide from my scrutiny of her.

Her neck. It’s so vulnerable there, all stretched out underneath my stare. I bend down slowly and press my nose against it and then smell it, starting from its base on up to her ear. Her scent pleases me.

“Your body is like the earth,” I whisper. She puckers her lips slightly. Blink, and I would’ve missed it. I grin. I must say I do like having her all to myself in my hands like this.

“Dont forget who made it so,” she responds. “I work hard for this.” A dark chuckle escapes my lips before I can stop it. She fits so well in my world.

One of my favorites.

“You make it worth it,” I say. “Tell me what else I need to know.” I exhale into her ear. And she breathes ragged against my inhale.

Breathe. Breathe.

“You think you ready for that?” she asks. She shifts her eyes back towards our magnetic connection and then back towards my eyes. They are brown and inquisitively moving back and forth ever so slightly underneath long, black eyelashes. Her mouth and nose are open, allowing her breath to feed her heart of which I’m sure is pumping furiously inside of her chest.

Pumping for me.

Before she can do anything else, I grab her by the throat with my other hand and pull her closer to me, her back on my chest. Of which is breathing heavily now.

“Follow me.”

And I push the back of her neck forward where she catches herself on the rail with her hands. I strip her of her thong in one decisive pull and fill her with my everything in the presence of Mother Nature.